Sunday, August 19, 2012


This is coming to you via my phone because I couldn't use a keyboard if I tried. Trust me- I have tried. It all started a few weeks ago when a slight tweak in my medications caused (among other things) the forgetting of appointments, one-off tasks, and the watering of my plants. I took my crisp menagerie as a cue to find a more resilient hobby.
For ages a friend had been talking about a newfound love of Flat Track Roller Derby, swearing it was perfect for me. After a little encouragement I started researching. A few YouTube films and a book later, I was seriously crushing. After my first live bout I was completely in love.
I ordered my skates over the phone to make sure they would ship over night (indie retail trick), then waited all day for them to arrive. When they finally came I could've been more pleased; a perfect fit, wheels that practically move on their own- if we didn't live on the second floor I'd be living in them!
But they were going to take some practice- these were no Roller-rink skates. I only got about 20 minutes of practice in before sundown on day one, but decided to skate to work the next morning anyway. I put on all my gear except elbow pads, because seriously, who hurts their elbow except in derby?
Well, after about the 4th fall I decided I had better walk for the time being, lest I be late for work.
That's when I noticed the pain in my arm. The more time passed, the less I could move it. By the afternoon I had a useless throbbing right angle of an appendage. Lesson learned: always wear ALL your pads.
The worse part is that now I have to wait to skate again.