Saturday, December 1, 2012

Stay on the Path

I don't do waiting well. The thing is that I've been doing an awful lot of it lately, at least when it comes to my graphic novel, school, work...OK, I've just been waiting a lot. But I'm a little nervous about it because this time, as I wait for the next move for my book I'm starting to lose the feeling that it's actually happening. It's not a logical feeling, because it is happening and these periods between steps are perfectly normal in the creation of a book. But it makes me apprehensive.

I find that when my life opens up, the way that it has lately, all kinds of distracting fillers flow in, and it's not easy to tell which are blessings and which are not. I believe roller derby was one of those fillers.  A good, educating experience, and in many ways, The Right Thing, just in The Wrong Time. In that case, I screwed up, over estimated my power and resources, and ended up missing registration for school. That Cannot Happen Again.

Then along comes my friend Tara. Tara is the mother of a friend of Lala's. She's a personal trainer,  sells health & wellness products, and is a text book Type A personality. She's also a sweetheart. But that is neither here nor there. Tara calls me the other day and says that she wants to tell me about her company because "With your self motivation, your health values, your energy, your need for flexibility right now- you'd be perfect!" I sniff a pyramid scheme, but there are a few factors that lead me to bite:

  1. She's nice and talkative and I want to go have tea
  2. She's the sole income of her house, and she's loaded
I'll never get her off my back if I don't
I meet her at Life Alive and we have a nice visit. We talk about me leaving my job and different kinds of tea and our girls. Then she tells me about the business. It's called Arbonne. I'm not wrong in the type of business model it is- you get bigger if others get bigger too, but on the other hand, it's the highest compensation program in the industry (I looked that up). I don't want to be the Mary Kay lady by any means. But on the other hand, they encourage a more casual, natural recommendation model. So she talks to me about the products. They're vegan- bonus. They remind me a lot of products like Juice by Alicia Silverstone. And she tells me that she can get them for cheaper than Clinique- which is the only thing to this point that's done me a lick of good. And she's brought samples for me. OK, OK, I think. Can't hurt if it's free.

This is where I've fallen to pieces.
I love the samples.
My laugh lines, eye lines, and worry lines are all gone. I've had worry lines since I was 16.

I don't know what to do. I want these products and I want them cheap. This is stupid. Am I getting distracted? Do I want to spend my time doing what she does? What if it was just a little bit of time? Can I do it all, or am I going to screw up again? Not if I get to class registration on Monday, right? Right!?